The Darkest Night

I know I'm not the only one writing about this today.

We have a total lunar eclipse on the full moon on the winter solstice. It's kind of a big day.

Above is a pic I found on the Huffington Post taken in El Salvador early this morning. It's the Savior of the World after the earth had passed in front of the full moon and turned it to that deep mysterious orange.

I like astrology; I don't know a whole whole lot about it past the basics that most of you probably know too. I know the basics of my chart, the basics of all the signs, and what it means when Mercury is in retrograde. But I am fascinated by it, and today I had a feeling that there would be some big stuff being written given these cosmic happenings. On Astrology Zone you can read more about eclipses. Bottom line is they bring change. Could seem positive, could seem challenging, but they bring change and with that the feeling of being suspended in the unknown. Doesn't have to be a scary thing.

Then I went over to the Golden Bridge site and listened to Gurmukh's message and learned that this is only the second time in 200, 000 years that we've had a solstice, full eclipse and full moon happening at once. Whoa. She says don't do humdrum ordinary things today. Even if you're in your routine, be present to the possibility of the extraordinary. I like that.

The solstice is the longest night and in that way it symbolizes a return to the light. The days will start getting longer. The light is slowly coming back. The end of the year is a time where we let go of the old and allow the new. I know I want to get clear on what I need to feel good about 2011 beginning. What thoughts I want to let go of. Start to shape my dreams for the new year. Tie up some loose ends specifically involving my health insurance. Do some file purging. Recognize what's old, not helpful, what's getting in the way. Make room for new dreams, let new ideas to take shape, embrace new happiness and welcome the unfolding of new freedom.

It's a busy time and we've all got a lot to do. But it could be nice to take a few minutes to meditate on the magnificence of the cosmos, to be willing to align with nature since, after all, we're made of the same elements, and whether we pay attention or not there are some unusual things happening out there. Or maybe we simply sit with closed eyes and be in the dark. A lot of amazing things happen in the dark.

Dandelion Ranch

Sounds like somewhere nice to hang out, doesn't it?

It's actually the name of my most favorite flower design boutique in LA.

Run by Clover and Fern (I mean, C'MON), it's not a shop you walk up to but rather a tucked-away stone room in Baldwin Hills where you can make an appointment to visit. I knew I was there when I came upon stacks of old tires with all sorts of lush wild things growing out of them.

I first found them when I was planning our wedding. I pulled this off the internet somewhere

as exactly the feel I wanted for the cocktail hour: elegant but a little bit wacky. Alas, our wedding not being in LA (hence needing to pay for flower travel) and me deciding to save money and do a lot of the flowers myself, I didn't hire Dandelion Ranch to do it. I'm still getting over that and torture myself sometimes by hanging out on their weddings page.

Thank God there are other reasons to buy flowers than a wedding.

I wanted to send an extra-special thank you this summer to one of my agents who kicked booty in negotiating a job for me, and I called up Dandelion. They said Modern or Rustic? I said Rustic. They put together this

and my agent just about died.

Then, it being the holidays, and I, for one, not being in need of another cookie, felt maybe I wasn't alone and rather than showering the agents' office with baked goods, I called again. Modern or Rustic? Modern. I brought them these

A peony and ranunculus and juniper berries and cool pine-cone-related thingys!

They almost died again.

Dandelion's whole philosophy is about letting the flowers do the expressing; not trying to arrange them in some crazy interpretive way but rather as though you stumbled across a rather perfect garden. They do the flowers for Mozza, Grace, and of course Lucques (yet another reason to worship that restaurant. We were there last night for Sky's bday with a party of 12 and we've converted everyone to being Lucques disciples) and I think maybe every great restaurant in LA.

Inside the studio is a giant blackboard with days of the week and what gets deliveries when. I got oddly thrilled, like I was seeing Helen Mirren's dressing room or something.

Needless to say, I'd recommend these ladies for any event or gift you have reason to throw or send. For my mom's party that I'm throwing Jan 6 (and haven't even started on eek) I might have to have something like this

or this

or this

or maybe this

or should I go succulent?

or berries. Definitely berries.

all photos courtesy of Dandelion Ranch

I might have to name a daughter something botanical in the hopes she'll open a Dandelion Ranch of her own one day.

Vive La France

Somehow I always have visions of the holidays being a time where I stay home and do nothing but make delicious treats, and somehow I am out and busier than I just about ever am. I bought 9 cookie tins from Ikea with grand plans of all the recipients of 4 different kinds of cookies, I've pulled recipes for black truffle pasta and Christmas cakes, I've read up on different peppermint extracts, and yet I feel like I've barely seen my kitchen to make more than morning oatmeal. I have not abandoned hope: there are a couple of events coming up in which I must make things for and am most excited to go all-out, plus we'll be in Taos for Christmas and I'll have ALL DAY EVERY DAY to cook eat cook eat repeat. Maybe read in the middle. THEN I'm throwing my mom a 60th birthday party on January 6th and I'll be cooking for 50. YES.

I actually did make persimmon jam this weekend and totally planned on posting it and it's just not that good. Maybe that's why I don't see persimmon jam out there more. I'm cleaning the jars and am going to try a recipe for persimmon butter which I hope will be a grander success. I'll share if so.

I did eat some amazing food this weekend at the Lazy Ox Canteen in Little Tokyo. That was some black truffle pasta. And some spaghetti squash that is dressed up as a decadent buttery herby bowl of heaven. And beautiful feta with olives and herbs. And pickled beets with creamed mushrooms. Huh? Indeed.

However, even if one isn't cooking excessively, there is never a shortage of gastronomical delights to share. And I have one for you. A little backstory:

As some of you know, my mom of aforementioned birthday party has a cookie business. Her cookies, while being the cult favorite snack, dessert and Christmas gift of many a West-sider, are making their way into Whole Foods soon, and part of that process is Mom now bakes in a commercial kitchen. (If you need to send Christmas gifts to business partners or thank-yous to your supporters, or anything like that you might send these cookies---Sky sends them every year and gets thank-you notes for weeks).

The kitchen sounds like a trip. You rent space by the hour and you're in there with anyone else that rented too. Did you ever read this book as a kid?

Mom says it feels like that.

She has shared kitchen time more than once with Razmig Cyril Tchoboian and his amazing macarons. Mom knows I love a macaron. And that I take them very very seriously. I, of course, asked if he'd give me a sample. Since I'm such a connoisseur he would be honored, I'm sure.....Mom says she's not sure if the French had sample in their vocabulary....Oh well.

But I went to his site, and all I can say is, Christmas gift for me from me? Or I order them for Mom's party but somehow they just don't last and I have to eat them before......

Voila!

Napoleon's Macarons

Voici les macarons

Tiramisu

Vanilla Creme Brulee

Rosewater

Chestnut Cream.

Oh my god.

And of course there is caramel. Coffee. Pistachio. Almond. There's cola and green tea and peanut butter chocolate. There are, in fact, 17 flavors.

Mes amis, ce sont tres formidable. Magnifique. Delicieuse.

And you can order them online and you know what? I just think you should. For New Year's. Or old year's. Or a special dinner. Or a birthday present. Or just because you like beautiful delicious things and life just gets to be about that sometimes.

If You're Playing Santa and are Stumped

Some clever planet-friendly gift ideas from our friends at Uncommon Goods

This decanter

and these wine glasses

give new meaning to the image of drinking from a windshield

Not sure what I mean? head to the site......

why settle for a boring tissue box when you can use one of these cutie things?

i love these for the kid who's not afraid to be smart

N is for Neuron!

this laptop case was a wetsuit. Dude.

I want someone to give this wine-barrel-turned-lazy-susan to me

And for the record why is a lazy susan called such?

Be in the I Don't Know

A wonderful woman I have the honor of knowing said this in her newsletter as she talked about the brilliance of being willing Not to Know

Jump up and down at the question marks long enough for them to become the exclamation points

I can think I have to solve it all. I don't. I can think I have to know how to get where I want to go. I don't. I can think if I don't come up with the path no one will. Not true. The universe usually has a much cooler, more creative, easier plan than mine if I'll just start breathing and enjoy this beautiful life.

Thanks so much, Shareen, for reminding me!

If you live in LA or NYC, or next time you visit, head to her store. It's more than clothes. As I'm sure you can guess.

Meet Jocelyn

Jocelyn and I have been friends for several years. The whole movement teacher/actress double life initially bonded us. She was a gyrotonics teacher; I, as you know, teach the yoga, and we've both been working away at our acting lives for a good while now. We've kvetched about wanting better agents, we've been up against each other for parts, we've been in great classes and totally lame classes together, we've supported each other's goals, we've eaten bad Italian food at 1am on more than one occasion, and alternately gone on and off sugar, gluten and alcohol.

Joss wrote a movie a while back that blew me away. Blew lots of people away actually. A funny, quirky, very very moving story called I am I about a girl connecting with her father for the first time. A father who's mental health is questionable.....I'll say no more. When I read the script I couldn't believe how she said so much in such clean language. By clean I mean nothing extra: spare in the best way. She's been working on getting it made. It is as hard as everyone says it is to get funding these days, and Joss is attached as writer, star and now DIRECTOR. Whoa. Fast forward over several months (a year maybe?) and Joss decides there's another way to go. She's raising the money herself via Kickstarter.

Please please give yourself a treat and go watch her video that explains about the movie. It's one long 4 1/2 minute take (that is a long brilliant take!) Then click on the button to learn more about backing her film. Even if you choose not to, reading the rewards you get for pledging different amounts are hilarious, genius, and completely enticing. But you could pledge $1 and help get this thing made. I am totally inspired by my friend. Talk about going after what you want. Yay Joss.

Her for a Day

I want to wear this:And walk around like that girl in those boots, those jeans, lounging in that sweater, carrying that bag. And with that hair. Found this here after seeing a picture from the same spread on Karey's blog .

How was your Thanksgiving? Ours was lovely. Lighthearted thanks to all the kids running around, delicious thanks to a kitchen full of good cooks, and warm thanks to the oven heating up the whole house. No pics unfortunately, but I made a crazy good salad which I'll make again at Christmas and post. Promise.

Thanks

My husband

dear friends

the beautiful work I've gotten to do this year

a healthy body

my parents

sunny cloudy days where the wind blows a lot

authors that write the books that change my life and wake me up

the feast we'll cook tomorrow

change: it always comes

the internet

our gorgeous home

the money to buy everything we need

my nephew Dashiell

my sister Nina

Shakespeare and Shaw

actors that make me want to be better

persimmons

the quiet of early morning

Vincenta, who cleans our home twice a month

my agents

the moon, the ocean

yoga

spinning

Lorena who cut my hair recently

leaders who stand up

handwritten letters

time off

the baby that's going to be ours one day

Marc Jacobs

my grandmothers

good wine

Taos sunsets

opening nights

checks that arrive in the mail

the power greater than me that I can turn anything over to

Emily Dickinson

Obie the golden retriever

facebook

deep laughs with friends

That was written in 4 minutes. The magnificent Abraham-Hicks folks call that a Rampage of Appreciation. The only reason I stopped at 4 minutes (other than that it made me feel like I was living a Madonna song) is that I need to pack up the car with fixings for tomorrow's meal, get myself showered and dressed and be out of the house at 7:45. But set a timer for your own challenge and get going. You can't help but feel happy when you're in love with your own life. And if you're feeling down, sad, scared, unsure, burnt out, or anything like that I can say from experience this is something that will start to lift you up.

Wishing you a beautiful Thanksgiving.

Audrey Would Do It

Sky and I had a rough weekend. We registered for, and were given, some pieces of Hermes china for our wedding. We had to buy a couple of extra cups to complete a set we'd registered for. Such haaaaard times!

That's the pattern. Balcon du Guadalquivir. Named after the balconies in Guadalquivir, Spain. OMG it's so gorgeous I could die. I realize it's perhaps the most popular of the Hermes designs but I care not. I am blissfully disproportinately happy to have a few of these for my very own home.

In debating which size cup would be most perfect to drink out of when eating macarons and profiteroles off these perfect plates(I said dainty teacups, Sky wanted the bigger breakfast cups; we've agreed we'll slowly amass 4 of each), we made our way to the Hermes boutique on Rodeo Drive to view our options up close and personal, and suddenly I was thrown off course.

I have a new passion and it is Hermes ashtrays.

I think I have to collect them. I, the compulsive declutterer (except when it comes to pitchers and vases and tea tins and linens and anything made by Heath....) have fallen slave to the beauty of objects that technically have no use in my home. Who smokes anymore? And certainly they don't in my house.

However, if I were to just hold a cigarette, I would certainly want to look like this

and if not out of a gold case, then they come out of a box as groovy as this

Fake smoking habit aside, I find these ashtrays sublime. You should have seen the four rows of them lined up on the wall of Hermes. I'll use them for other things. Sadly they are about $260 retail for new ones and they average around $500 for vintage ones on ebay.

But I am not giving up.

Let it B

For some reason I became completely obsessed with the prenatal vitamins I was taking yesterday. I've been taking prenatals for a year, as I've read you should start taking them 3 months before you want to conceive, and we started in January. Then things went a different way, and if you've been here for a while, you know it's been a longer more winding road than we thought. However, I started obsessing yesterday because it feels closer. A lot closer, and the reason for that is this:

Vitamin B.

I am only telling you this in case some of you are going through my most recent challenge on the fertility frontier. After getting my body to have a cycle, after ridding it of all cysts, after joyfully going up a jeans size to allow all of this to be possible, I had a Short Luteal Phase. Meaning my body wasn't making enough progesterone, which means I couldn't hold a pregnancy if I got one, which was not the news I wanted to hear. After a little research, I learned it's soooooo common, and the most common cure? Vitamin B6. 50-250 mg a day.

I took 100 mg for 2 weeks and the next time that luteal phase was normal, healthy, and plenty long.

I grabbed a bottle from Whole Foods that was mid-price range from a brand I'd heard of and BOOM. Total difference. I, of course, am continuing to take it. It's funny because when I asked my doctor about it she was pretty vague. This seems like it should be household knowledge for women. We can make it part of ours at least.

And for those of you curious, I've decided New Chapter and Rainbow Light prenatal vitamins are equally amazing. Rainbow Light lists more of the minerals that Dr. Christiane Northrup likes to see, but honestly, both are incredible, food-based, super-high-quality vitamins that have supported amazing friends of mine who have unbelievable kids.

Here's to the next generation:)

I Heart Beth Lapides

I have such aspirations for my blog! Such organization, such regularity, such consistency! I've planned and re-planned the themes, what I'll do every Monday, every Thursday, when I'll post quotes.....I've managed to do exactly NONE of the above. I get here when I get here, and, in my quest to embrace my imperfections, focus on how much I love putting things up here, and do what I can do. For those of you that read, I so thank you. And for those of you that comment, well, you make my day. Honestly.

A loooooong time ago I posted on this beautiful being. And with it I said I wanted to post about inspiring women regularly. I think I've done that, mmm, one other time. I've thought about a lot of candidates though:) However, I went to a show last week that rocked my world. If you don't live in LA and therefore can't get to one of the shows yourself, never fear: you can browse the website and listen to podcasts and it'll be like you were in the room. I'd like to introduce you to Beth Lapides. She takes the "ow" out of "Now". She wrote that, not me.

She does a show called "100% Happy 88% of the time" currently playing at the Improv Lab Theatre on Melrose Wednesday nights for a few more weeks. I'll wreck it if I try to explain it to you, but a hint is that being FINE sucks. Be really happy or really bloody miserable, because they're much closer together than you'd think. And when you're unhappy, confused, scared, don't know where to turn, there are signs from your friend the cosmos all around to point you in the right direction. Beth is a gifted comedienne, and I am not, so I won't try to humorously recount her insanely humorous show, butI will tell you what I love about it.

At the heart of it, I'd say, is the balance between living today, in LA, and being on that Hollywood ride, and at the same time, and perhaps more importantly so, being drawn to and unable to get away from, the sense--no, more than a sense--that the cosmos is a real thing and that tapping into is is muy importante. In fact, everything you need is right there at your mystical fingertips. OMG my thoughts exactly!!! If you head over to her syndicated column (yes, I steered you to a post I particularly like, and yes, she's a yogi---PURR) you'll get a sense of why she describes herself in her bio as "a Type-A free spirit: working hard to let the wind blow her where it will." OMG that's me!!!

I love this woman. She is rad rad RAD. And what I love, too, is that as I drove home, I remembered how much happier I am when I surrender to the part of myself some might call Out There. When she talked about skepticism and then miracles surrounding a particular incident involving angel healings, I laughed so hard I hurt and also thought YEEEEEEES!!! I love when I let these miracles happen, and I am so much happier when I am believing in signs and listening for cosmic cues. I do meditate, I do believe in the Law of Attraction, I do take time every day to connect to and thank powers bigger than me.....and yet I can still get lost. Still think the to-do list is more important than getting enough sleep. Still get scared that so-and-so got the job I wanted---as if the right one isn't coming to me at the exact right time. And on top of that I can be cynical! So so so so cynical! Like rolling-my-eyes-wishing-they-would-shut-up-about-crystals-already-cynical! I love reminders, and I love when they're hilarious reminders, to come back to myself and to let this life be the wild ride that it is, and that we are all so much more connected than it can seem when we're in our pods. I mean cars. And that I love crystals. In fact I want a crystal. In fact I love people who know a lot about crystals. Thank you, Beth, for reminding me of that, and thank you for being an inspiration for where consciousness can take you if you let it.

both images from her site

She runs workshops, she has podcasts, she has a book of haikus, and yes, she even has a blog.

While you peruse her site, I'm taking a trip over to Mystic Journey Bookstore and getting better acquainted with my inner angel listener.

Perfect Purple Plum Cake

Lovely weekend. Had Sky's officemates over for brunch on Sunday. (Hi gang!)I used the recipe in the November Martha for baked french toast and it was delish. Best part is you make it the night before, which meant on the day of I was downright relaxed. Reading the paper while I waited for everyone to arrive. If you know me you know this is about as unlikely as snow in South Carolina, but it can in fact happen!

On Saturday I felt the gods smiled upon me. As I browsed the farmers' market, there, sitting in their neat green plastic baskets, were a goodly bunch of Italian plums. Darker and smaller than their juicy American counterparts (somehow everything in America is always bigger), Italian plums are sweet without being overwhelmingly juicy the way those Americanos can be. Which makes them ideal for slicing, which makes them ideal for baking. So many times I've tried to halve a juicy plum only to be left with emptied plum skin on my fingers and the fruit inside mushed and squeezed and all over the cutting board.

Not so with these little beauties. They slice cleanly down the middle, the pit comes right out, and they're ready to sit atop a light cakey batter which became their destiny the moment I laid eyes upon them.

My grandmother gave me the recipe for this cake. It's not really a cake; it's actually a torte, but we (meaning my family) all call it Plum Cake. Sounds homier than the more bourgeois Plum Torte. I've been amazed since I started making it how many people have traded in their plum cake recipe for this one, I think because it is so delicious and so easy. You can make the batter in less than 10 minutes, then all there is to do is top it with plums and pop it in the oven for about an hour.

My grandmother didn't bake that much when I was a kid that I remember. That was left to my great- aunt Jennie. Giovannina actually, but we called her Jennie. She was famous for apricot upside-down cake, pineapple upside-down cake, strawberry torte (speaking of tortes, and this one you couldn't call a cake--way too fancy. I'll share with you sometime), apple charlotte....she was the baker at every holiday, which is when I saw her and my grandmother. We'd travel to New Jersey which is where my parents met when they were in high school and where my dad's family still lived, and if it was Thanksgiving we'd spend it at Jennie's, if it was Christmas at my grandparents'.

My grandmother was famous for her leg of lamb, turnip mashed potatoes, and green beans that even kids devoured. She's Russian, and grew up in Africa and Paris, and her cooking is beautiful and simple. Elegantly simple. Perfectly simple. She's one of those women who never seems to overeat, has her glass of wine every night, and has been the same size her entire adult life. My grandpa was happy with coffee ice cream for dessert, and half the time Jennie and my uncle Stef were over for dinner anyway so I guess she didn't need to be taking sweet things in and out of the oven.

But now Jennie and my grandpa have passed away, and my grandmother divides her time between my aunt in Philadelphia and a condo near my dad in Taos. She has a couple of Italian plum trees in her backyard in Taos, and necessity is the mother of invention, as they say. Or at least adaptation. With so many ripe perfect plums my grandmother found a recipe for a cake that would show them off.

When I saw the plums in the market I did a happy dance. We were going to friends' for dinner, I was on dessert duty, and I was feeling a little crunched for time. I made the cake, it was fab as always, and my friend even said it was like one of his mother's cakes, which apparently is a giant compliment. So here it is.

Plum Torte

from my grandmother Nina Lora

I'm not sure where she found it.....

3/4 c sugar

1/2 c sweet butter

1 c unbleached flour, sifted

1 teaspoon baking powder

pinch salt

2 eggs

24 (approximately) halved pitted Italian plums

Topping: sugar, lemon juice, cinnamon

Preheat oven to 350

Cream butter and sugar

Add flour, baking powder, salt and eggs

Beat well!*

Spoon batter into 8" or 9" springform pan

Place plums skin side up on top of batter

Sprinkle lightly with lemon juice, sugar and cinnamon

Bake for 50 min to an hour**

ENJOY!

*By beating well, I mean beat til the batter is good and spreadable. At first it will be thick and stiff. Keep going. It'll still be thick but much more....mobile, if you will

** Or if you have an antique oven that likes to get really hot even when someone comes to regulate it periodically, bake at 325 (or however much you're used to adjusting yours) and tent with foil if the top starts to get too brown.

***And lastly, I have made this with regular plums, I've made it with plums and nectarines--you really could put anything on there that strikes your fancy. I happen to find the Italian plums particularly suited, and it's how my grandmother always does it.

photo taken before topping was sprinkled and before cake went in oven. And oops! forgot to take a picture of the finished product. You know me.

O yeah Ojai

Sky and I hid from Halloween this year. We had big plans to be at what I'm sure was an amazing dance party, but having danced quite a lot and drank, I'd say, gallons of champagne at a swanky New York black tie wedding the weekend prior, we were done. Plus we realized we really didn't know anyone at this party, so would we rather hang out with each other in sweaty costumes or in plush robes at a spa? Maybe we're getting old but we chose Exhibit B: cancelled the party plans and booked a room last minute at the Ojai Valley Inn and Spa. There are deals to be had when you're spur of the moment my friends!

A gorgeous 90-min drive up PCH and inland a few miles and we were there. It takes me longer to get to Hollywood some days. This was waiting for us in our cozy room:

It says Happy Anniversary since when they asked if we were celebrating anything I said it was a belated anniversary since I guess it kind of was. But I'm the girl who celebrates my birthday for a good month.

In case you haven't heard we've been having summer weather in California, which is kinda nice since we didn't have it this summer. So this sun is as warm as it looks out our window

On Sunday we rented bikes and rode to the farmers' market. The market was so pretty and just like when someone makes you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich it tastes better than yours, this market, though so much smaller than my gorgeous ones at home, captivated me. Their heirloom pumpkins were particularly perfect.

And they have some incredible vendors that don't come down to LA, including Ojai olive oil which has one gazillions of awards over the years. We brought a bottle home of their signature variety which is strong and grassy like I like it, but I think I NEED a jar of the olive oil face cream. My skin won't weather the harsh California winter without it.

We also came back with insanely delicious raw agave-sweetened chocolate which Mimi has been making for 30 years. Can you say Fig Truffle? Can you say Fig Truffle with a fig truffle in your mouth? Maybe I'll show you that picture sometime.....

Then there was Mt. Olive farm which had lovely jams and salad dressings as well as fresh juices including Pine Needle juice which I didn't try because I had so many other tastes happening but I wish I had. They literally juice pine needles and add some lime. Let me know if you try that one at home. I brought home some Shiso Leaf tea which is like a soft version of mint. Yum.

We ate at low-key local joints instead of the fancier hotel restaurant and drove to Meditation Mount on Sunday to see the sunset. But the best part was that we slept for 10 hours a night and were together 24/7 with the exception of the couple hours apart in the his and hers spa. Dressing up as a Laid-Back person suits me just fine.

And then, since you know this is on my mind a lot, I'll say that we each had a crazy wild moment of feeling how surreal it is to think that when I do get pregnant there will be a period of time where we don't know it. Only the powers bigger than us and that soul that will be our child will know it. You just can't test right away which means there is biologically built into our lives a window of waiting in the utter unknown. How magnificently mysterious and brilliantly engineered is that?

Anti-Vampire

Happy Halloween! Why do I have a feeling there will be lots of Twilight costumes this year?

I came across this quote from one of my favorite books of all time, Shantaram. Seriously, if you have never read it you are in for a phenomenal journey. And quite a commitment. It's over a thousand pages. But I would read it again. Images from that book haunt me in the good way. There, that's Halloweeny! They haunt me. Like photos I want to step into if I could reach into another dimension. I bookmarked so many pages in that book.....This one leapt up at me today.

You can't kill love.....Love is the passionate search for a truth other than your own; and once you feel it, honestly and completely, love is a forever. Every act of love, every moment of the heart reaching out, is part of the universal good: it's part of God, or what we call God, and it can never die.

Gregory David Roberts, author of Shantaram

I guess love not vampirism is the way to live forever:)

Alex and Ani

One of my dearest friends in the world introduced me to the Alex and Ani (named for the designer's kids) jewelry line while I was in NYC last weekend.

I love these because 1)they are gorgeous. When I wear gorgeous things I feel more gorgeous. Not because of the thing itself necessarily, but because I took the time to put on something I want to wear, something I love, and that's esteemable. That's good for my relationship with me. And 2) they are made consciously, mindfully, with the intention of connecting the wearer to dimensions within: strength, grace, compassion, generosity. I love a visual reminder of an intention. It doesn't have to be a literal reminder--as in it doesn't have to say LOVE--but if it reminds me of that then every time I look at that I'm going to remember.

A sampling:

I love cuffs. And eagles are rad. So powerful and graceful and ass-kicking when they need to be.

This one's part of her Charity by Design collection. Proceeds from these pieces go to the charity the piece is associated with, and she's always rotating new causes in. This one saves the African rainforests. Yes.

I'm not really a headband person but I'd make an exception for this one.

The Halo Divinity Circle. Need I say more?

Stunning, no? As you might have guessed from my love affair with the Virgins, Saints and Angels line, I love a piece that has relics from the past. She has a whole Byzantine collection.

And that's just a beginning. You can design your own bangle at the Bangle Bar (me I'm going for a zodiac charm--Leo--and some beaded metal ones with a plain gold or 2 thrown in). The prices are really reasonable for something you'll have forever.

Time to start that Santa list.

If You Choose to Accept Your Mission

Sky and I are heading to New York tomorrow for a wedding. A fancy New York black tie wedding. FUN. Back early next week so see you after that.

Meanwhile I am going to leave you with a challenge. If you choose to accept we will be teammates for the next 30 days.

When Misalliance ended Sky was in Hawaii on business. Upon returning, and knowing his wife to be the type that with too much unstructured time on her hands can go a little kookoo, he presented me with a sticker which he said was to be my new mantra in this period of more free time.

Here it is:

I'll have you know I've mounted the sticker prominently in our kitchen. Eww. I see spots on the wall above it I need to go clean. I've never noticed those before!

While you might at first find this message offensive, I assure you its meaning is beneficent. Sky is challenging me to 30 days of no worrying. I am so good at worrying! And nothing like free time on my hands to get me going. Sky can tell by the look on my face if the hamster (ie the worrisome thought track in my brain) has been running. His favorite thing is to look over and see me peaceful. Then, he says, the hamster is meditating. That or she drank a lot of wine:)

So I'm taking this on. Because I'd really like this period when I'm not so busy to be a beautiful one. One in which I take more time for meditation, friends, kundalini yoga, reading, cooking, let alone time with my HUSBAND--things I LOVE to do that I've had to put on the back burner for a while. But trust me, I could stress out the entire time if I wanted to. Perhaps you relate. So in addition to putting into practice all the things that I've listed above, I also need to NOT do certain things that can get me going.

Things that contribute to me worrying excessively: too much time on the computer (called The Silver Bullet), too much time on the iphone (called The Baby Bullet), too much time puttering in the house looking for things that are wrong with it, too much time spent comparing myself to other people especially at the gym and IMDB, balancing my checkbook late at night, getting on the computer first thing in the morning, wondering how much money I'll have thirty days from now, wondering what jobs I'll have by the end of the year, spinning at the thought that I might never get pregnant, wondering if that will destroy my life, trying to plan my schedule for the end of next week, the political quagmire that is this country. I think these are the big ones.

If you want to be my worriless warrior buddy perhaps you'll make two similar lists. Perhaps we can post them in prominent places to remind ourselves what we love to do and what isn't so great for us. Perhaps we'll telepathically connect or find each other on Facebook and send messages that we quieted the hamster for today and totally enjoyed ourselves. I think having a good deal of fun every day is a worthy goal.

Here we go......30 days....Starting now